The Power of Friendships
Isolation aids secret sins. Samson had no friends to hold him accountable. Look at Judges 14:
“His father went to visit the woman, and Samson prepared a feast there, as young men were accustomed to do. When the Philistines saw him, they brought 30 men to accompany him” (vv. 10-11).
Samson’s parents brought the companions to his party, 30 of them to be exact. Of these companions, the best one of them, Samson’s best man, ends up marrying Samson’s wife (see Judges 15:1-2). That shows you how close they really were. Samson was a loner. We don’t read any mention of him having a close friend.
If Satan can get us alone, he’s got us half beaten. If we want to get a leg up on the devil, we need to have authentic, God-honoring, trustworthy, call-us-out-when-we-do-wrong friends. Good friends are indispensable to a life of holiness.
In the Bible, Moses had Joshua (Deuteronomy 31; 34); Ruth had Naomi (Ruth 1–4); David had Jonathan (1 Samuel 20); Elijah had Elisha (1 Kings 19); and Paul had Barnabas (Acts 9; 13; 2 Timothy 4). In the fictional world, Tom Sawyer had Huck Finn. Gilligan had Skipper. Forrest had Bubba.
Our ultimate example of the value of relationships is Christ Himself. Jesus had three: Peter, James, and John.
“Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up. Also, if two lie down together, they can keep warm; but how can one person alone keep warm? And if someone overpowers one person, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not easily broken” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12).
We’ve talked about the importance of having a close friend. But maybe you don’t have any. Or maybe the ones you have aren’t good for your life. Instead of pointing you toward Jesus, they only distract you.
We’ve all heard the clichés: “Bad company corrupts good morals.” “Don’t be unequally yoked to an unbeliever.” “If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.” “Misery loves company.” “You’re known by the company you keep.” These statements hold truth.
Who we spend our time with affects who we become.
“The wounds of a friend are trustworthy, but the kisses of an enemy are excessive” (Proverbs 27:6).
“Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another” (Proverbs 27:17).
Some of my best friends have been made on the basketball court, the running trail, or on a hunting trip. Deep friendships grow out of time spent together. It’s that time together that allows me to determine if I trust you or not.
When you find the right people, the chemistry is there, you “click” with them. Your personalities, sense of humor, goals, ambitions, and outlook on life mesh together. You have camaraderie. But most importantly, if the friendships look the way God intends, you have Christ-likeness. You inspire one another to godliness.
Challenge yourself: Get in each others’ grills. Somebody has to speak truth in love to you! Your life depends on it.
“But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into Him who is the head—Christ. From Him the whole body, fitted and knit together by every supporting ligament, promotes the growth of the body for building up itself in love by the proper working of each individual part” (Ephesians 4:15-16).
“Watch out, brothers, so that there won’t be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart that departs from the living God. But encourage each other daily, while it is still called today, so that none of you is hardened by sin’s deception” (Hebrews 3:12-13).
When we don’t have friends who take care of and watch out for us, we run a greater risk of growing cold and calloused toward God. We need encouragement, and we need to give it, too. If we want to have good friends, we’ve got to be good friends.
Dr. Chip Henderson has served as the senior pastor and primary teacher at Pinelake Church since 1999. He is well known for his commitment to Biblical, life application teaching. Chip’s passion is to see Christ bring about powerful life-change in people — stirring a spiritual movement that will change the world. Chip holds a PhD in New Testament studies and is the co-creator of the L3 Journal. He and his wife, Christy, have three children.
